A Grace Prayer

Father, Before I thank You for the freedom Your grace has provided for me, I have to ask for forgiveness for not appreciating it, not even giving it much thought most days. If I give it thought apart from Sunday--church--or Tuesday Bible studies--it is when I am in the Bible and in prayer, and all too often, even those times, I end up lacking full focus on You.
I need to ask for forgiveness for that too, for letting my mind wander, and rather than bringing it back with my will, letting it take me, letting inertia dominate; I think I have a lot to repent of. But Father, if not for Your grace, I would not, could not, see the need to repent, nor would I have this access to You through Your Son, the Lord Jesus Christ. If not for Your grace, I would still be dead in my trespasses and sins, and think I was alive. If not for Your grace, I would neither be the woman I am, nor have any hope of being the woman I am in the process of becoming. Help me understand and appreciate the ramifications of Your grace--and mercy and peace--in daily life, and to apply them in all of my life with my husband and everyone else--even those who call at inopportune times. Before I can appreciate the freedom Your grace has provided, I have to be more aware of all that grace itself includes--and be able to give an answer if someone asks me about that grace. Way too often I just go and do not see grace, even when grace is going with me. Way too often when someone mentions saving grace, my thoughts go to life's end rather than to life's present, or even life's past; how limiting that thought is! Way too often I don't come to the well of grace, but go dry and more dry, then complain about the dryness in my life/heart, when that is my own fault--and fault I do not seek grace for. Way too often--let this be the end of that; let there be no more "way too oftens," no more regrets for choices made without thought. And then there are the consequences: When I do not receive grace, I cannot deliver grace to others who need it. When I do not receive grace, I cannot appreciate its full value. When I do not receive grace, I fall back into the so-called gospel of works. When I do not receive grace, I, in essence, abuse it, frustrate it, turn from it. But God .... But God, Your grace pursues me, through circumstances and Scriptures, through messages from others and through messages from Your Word in study. And O, my Father, how grateful I am for Your pursuing grace. May I so live that others realize that that is what it is, and that it pursues them as well. May Your grace work to Your glory in all, to all, through all, for all. Amen.